Ok I just really have to rant on this one.
I just had a woman tell me that every professional she has seen (and she's visited quite a few!) has told her that it is “normal” for a woman to NOT have a sex drive, to just get over it, or that there’s nothing that can be done for her.
First of all, WHO is telling her this!!!?
Seriously---it’s “NORMAL” for a woman to have no sex drive? On what planet? Where? When?
Let me set the record straight: No it is NOT normal for a woman to have no sex drive.
YES There are certainly cases and medical situations where a woman’s sex drive could be affected. Medications, surgeries, hormonal changes, asexuality, etc…
But to be told it is just part of being a woman to feel “nothing”?
Um, I don’t think so!
And THIS IS EXACTLY WHY I DO WHAT I DO.
THIS IS WHY I am so PASSIONATE about educating and empowering women about how their bodies work, about the unique arousal and desire patterns of women, and what can be done to activate arousal, enhance pleasure, and deepen connection.
This is one of the reasons I talk so much about resolving things like resentment and guilt—because when we as women are blocked in our hearts we also are blocked in our genitals.
When we numb out our feelings, we also numb out our capacity to experience pleasure.
When we don’t know what we are feeling or how to communicate our feelings and needs, we completely lose access to our power and as a result sex does not feel safe for us.
So we shut down “down there” as well.
There are some good solid reasons women shut down to or lose interest in sex over time particularly when in long term relationships.
Want to know what they are and learn what to do instead of hormones, pills, or just dealing with it?
Then let's talk.
Click the button below to book your no cost complimentary phone consult and let's see how I can help.
P.S. For more on this topic, check my Sex Talk Café podcast episode on the topic: Low Desire in Long Term Relationships: Why Pills and Hormones Are Not The Answer (and what to do instead!) available on iTunes here
And let’s make sure this MYTH about it being “normal” for women to have no sex drive is dispelled once and for all.
Sep 26, 21 03:08 AM
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Dr. Bettty Martin is a former Chiropractor, and is currently a sex and touch coach, and certified Cuddle Party facilitator in Seattle, WA.